By: Dr. Jeff Fuller
Everyone remembers Ray Stevens. His birth name is Harold Ray Ragsdale and has a birthday this month (January 24, 2939). He is the American country and pop singer-songwriter and comedian so many of us grew up with and have loved and laughed with through the years. Why they waited until 2019 to induct him into the Country Music Hall of Fame, I will never understand.
Some of his Grammy winning recordings, “Everything is Beautiful” and “Misty” were songs of my early years. We must not forget his inspirational release, “Love Lifted Me.” The comedy hit, “The Streak,” was popular when I was hanging out at the racetrack as a child (but we will leave that for another story). He has recently been seen on Facebook singing his newest release, “The Quarantine Song.”
“I’m washing my hands like a raccoon with OCD
I’ve watched Hulu, Roku, Netflix, PBS, and BBC
I’ve taken down all my mirrors ’cause I’m sick of what I see
Two more weeks of quarantine will be the death of me”
A few months ago, I was in my office working away and heard a noise which I could not quite grasp. In church buildings you will hear a lot of noises which fit that concept. There have been several strange noises which are difficult to explain and have been attributed to various and sundry explanations in our church building.
Sitting at my desk the noise sounded like a clawing going on over my left shoulder. Training my ear to listen, I waited for the noise to register and looked to my left but saw nothing amiss. Then silence. Resuming my work, I waited and when I heard the noise again it was to my left and toward the ceiling. Turning in that direction and lifting my head, I saw two little feet and above the feet were a nose and two beady eyes looking back at me. Immediately the varmint retreated, I jumped and screamed like a schoolgirl.
Retrieving a yardstick, I proceeded to see if I could find the rascal but to no avail.
Going back to work at my desk, attempting to study the scripture, I was hypersensitive and jumping at every sound. Then I heard what sounded like chirping. It was in front of me and to my right. Looking up, cautiously, I saw the thing sitting on top of my curio cabinet, staring back at me. Yes, it was staring and laughing in that little animal way.
How could a varmint weighing almost nothing do what it did at that moment to a grown man I will never know. I was on me desk, yelling into the phone at my wife, “There is a squirrel in my office!”
She was relaying the message to my daughter and they were both laughing at me.
“This is not funny; come…now!” I said, then remembered they were in Atlanta. “Never mind, I will take matters into my own hands.”
In the background I heard Savannah say, “Don’t hurt it Daddy.”
Well, the thing slid out of my office and down the hall into the Family Life Center. I closed the door to my office and the double doors between the hall and the gym and we had a come to Jesus meeting. I opened the side door and took the broom and beat anything in sight.
Going to the door, I thought I saw something small running along the back wall of the Masonic Building and said, “Good riddance!”
Going back to my office, I thought of the song:
“The day the squirrel went berserk
In the First Self-Righteous ChurchIn that sleepy little town of Pascagoula
It was a fight for survival
That broke out in revival
They were jumpin pews and shouting Hallelujah!”
And I prayed. Prayed with a fervency, pleading fervently with the Lord surrendering anew my life, my all to Him who makes all things small and great. And my prayer included these words, from the bottom of my heart:
“Lord, send revival, but do it through the Holy Ghost and not through a squirrel, please.”
Until next time…